Overscheduled kids

I always hear stories about how kids are overscheduled these days.  Too many lessons, practices, and other activities and not enough free time to just play, and lots of time spent driving around in the car.  This week I experienced it, and hope to not experience it again.  At least not for a looong time.  As part of a plan to not overschedule my kids during the school year, I let each child choose one activity to sign up for this summer.  My 5 year old chose a city sports camp where they go for 1 hour each day for 4 days and learn a different sport each day (soccer, baseball, basketball, and football).  My girls each chose a dance camp put on by the local theater, that was 2 hours each day for 5 days with a little performance on the last day.

I thought I was being clever by having both girls sign up for the same week.  Even though one would go in the morning and the other in the afternoon, I thought it would be better to have the girls go one week, and my boy go a few weeks later.  Ugggh.  What this really meant was that 4 times a day I was driving to the theater to drop off or pick up.  While hauling 4 other children around with me.  We went at 9:30, 11:30, 12:30 and 2:30.  I hated it and my kids hated it as well.  The first day, my 5 year old started throwing a fit at the last pick up.  "I don't want to go! I hate this!"  I had to agree with him.  After that first day, I decided we weren't going to do "school" for the week or worry about practicing piano.  I wanted them to be able to have time to play. 

I still am glad my girls went to the camp.  They had a blast! And I'm still glad we chose to do one week of dance camp rather than worrying about every week taking them to a practice during the school year (and paying for it every month).  But, wow, I'm recommitted to not overscheduling my kids as they get older.  If nothing else, there's no way I want to spend that much time in the car.  I can think of much more enjoyable and productive uses of my time.

Love/Hate Relationships

This post is inspired by my sister's post on her love/hate relationship with Mother's Day. http://thefoards.blogspot.com/2012/05/love-hate-relationship.html
My love/hate relationships, however, are with certain toys/activities.  Here are some of the things I love and hate simultaneously.

1 - Play-doh. Maybe it's because some of my children are still pretty young, but this is definitely not a hands-off activity.  "Mom, will you press it down for me." "Mom, will you help me make..." "Waaah, it didn't work." Maybe if I bought new play-doh more frequently, it would constantly be soft and my children would not need me to smash it flat for them. It just always seems to be a fairly time-intensive activity.
2 - Sidewalk chalk. Are there many things messier? They can draw some cool pictures, but everyone ends up covered with chalk and needing to change clothes and wash off.  The baby especially enjoys talk.  It seems to taste good, and crawling through it seems to be extra enjoyable.
3 - Bubbles. Everyone enjoys bubbles, but I'm pretty sure it's impossible to do bubbles without one or more of my children spilling theirs and being in tears because it's all gone.

I understand that really it's just my laziness that causes me to hate some toys.  But really, if I'm going to spend time doing an activity with my children, I confess that I'd rather have it be something I enjoy also. What toys do you have a love/hate relationship with?

Family traditions

I love having my very own family traditions.  I have plenty of family traditions that I've inherited from my family or that my husband has inherited from his family, but there's something special about family traditions that we've created ourselves. 

We went to the Orem Summerfest carnival one year out of curiosity and had fun.  The next year we decided we should try again.  Pretty soon it became something our children expected and looked forward to every year, asking when it was going to happen again. 

I think it helps in defining our families as we develop traditions that our truly and uniquely our own.

Bending the Rules

So, we've had a rule of no bike riding in the house.  You know, one of those rules you would never think of having until you have children and realize the number of things you need to specify.  For Christmas, Santa brought our 5 year old a scooter and our 3 year old a 12" bike.  There has been snow on the ground and the weather has been freezing cold - not ideal conditions for riding bikes and scooters.  I never considered our house that large, but apparently our long hallway and kitchen covered with linoleum are ideal conditions for bike and scooter riding.  So we are bending the rules in celebration of Christmas.  Every day, several times a day, they ride up and down the hallway.  I'm sure it's not ideal treatment for my floors, but if it keeps my kids happy and burns off some of the extra energy they have from candy and not enough time spent outdoors, I'm happy to bend the rules. Let's just hope come summer they don't still want to ride indoors.

And the answer is...read a book.

I've found that the answer to many problems with my children is "read a book".  If my children are fighting, I'll say, "Why don't we read some books." If we have time before bedtime but need to keep things calm, "Let's get our library books out." If we're waiting for dinner or lunch to be ready, "Let's read some books until the timer goes off." If I'm too tired to do anything that requires any effort, "Why don't you bring me a book to read." Even if one of them says they don't want to read a book, if I start reading aloud, they wander in and start listening.

I really believe that reading is the answer to a lot of problems.  Obviously there are educational benefits for my children if I read to them, but it's also just a lot of fun.  We go to the library every week and get new books, and it's like buying new toys for my children.  Sometimes we do get some of the same books over and over, but usually I know I only have to read a book over and over for a week.  (This is especially comforting for some of the really poorly written or annoying children's books out there).

I used to limit the number of books to 2 or 3 for each child each time we went, but I decided I'd rather have them get 6 or 7 and read through them and decide whether it's a book they like or not.  Thank goodness for the receipts the library prints that list all the books you have checked out.  And thank goodness for the library.  They've saved me thousands of dollars and lots of tears.

Getting out of the house

It's not an easy thing to take 3 kids out of the house.  For one thing, it takes forever to get a diaper bag packed with diapers, wipes, snacks, tissues, water bottles, hats, etc.  It would be so much easier in some ways to just stay home and never worry about going anywhere.  I had to make a conscious decision to take my kids to a weekly activity, whether it's the library, the park, or wherever.  Inertia will otherwise take over my family and I'll look back and say "Wow, there were some really cool things we could have done and experienced as a family." 

I have a list hanging up on my fridge of free activities and ones that cost money.  When I think of something or see something online or in the paper, I add it to the list.  Not all of the activities work out.  Just last week we drove to what I thought was a free museum (that's what I get for growing up near the Smithsonians) and found out it was going to cost $7 to take my kids.  It wasn't worth it to me, so we drove to the closest park instead.  Sometimes it's exhausting to me as well as to the kids to go do things, but then my 4 year old will say something like "That was the best thing ever!" and I know it was worth it.

It was difficult at first for me to start going on activities without my husband and just with my kids.  For one thing, it's awful helpful to have another set of hands.  But also, I like spending time with him and having him do fun things with us.  It's just not reasonable, though, to wait to do all activities when Dad is home from work in the evenings or on the weekends.  I think I'm adjusting to that and just learning to take lots of pictures and make sure the kids tell Dad about their day and what they've done.

It's getting easier to take the kids out and about, and I'm sure a lot of that is because they're getting older.  If you're nursing or have a baby that takes a bottle, it's even more coordinating that takes place.  But, what a great experience it's been for me to get out of the house and experience so much.  Until I started looking, I had no idea how many free and fun activities there are in the area.